Have you ever caught yourself scrolling through social media, looking at someone else’s highlight reel, and feeling like you’re falling behind?
Maybe a friend just landed a dream job, a former classmate bought a beautiful home, or someone you follow seems to have the perfect relationship. Suddenly, what you have feels smaller, less significant.
We’ve all been there. But as the famous saying goes, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” And it’s true—when we measure our worth against someone else’s success, we rob ourselves of the happiness that exists in our own life.
How might this be holding you back?
Why Comparison Can Be Harmful
Comparison can make us feel inadequate, stuck, or even like we’re failing. But here’s the truth: Life isn’t a competition. Someone else’s win is not your loss. Just because someone else is thriving doesn’t mean you aren’t.
Too often, we compare ourselves to people whose circumstances, talents, or experiences are completely different from ours. Think about it—if you compare your gym routine to an Olympic athlete’s, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.
You will never be the Simone Biles of gymnastics unless you are Simone Biles. That doesn’t mean you can’t be a great athlete in your own right, but it does mean it will be different.
And that’s okay. Different doesn’t equal bad.
When we use comparison as a measure of our worth, we stop growing. We get stuck in a mindset of not enoughness—not smart enough, not successful enough, not lovable enough. That kind of thinking keeps us small and holds us back from achieving what we’re capable of.
Turning Comparison Into a Teacher
But what if comparison isn’t all bad? What if, instead of using it to tear ourselves down, we used it to build ourselves up?
Comparison can be a powerful teacher when we use it as a tool for growth. If you admire something that someone else has—a job, a relationship, a skill—ask yourself: What can I learn from them?
- What steps did they take to get where they are?
- What habits or mindset shifts contributed to their success?
- What can I apply to my own life in a way that aligns with my strengths and goals?
This shift in perspective allows comparison to become an inspiration rather than a limitation. It helps us recognize possibilities instead of deficits.
Your Life, Your Pace
It’s important to remember that success and happiness don’t follow a one-size-fits-all timeline. Just because someone achieved something before you doesn’t mean you won’t get there in your own time.
Instead of comparing yourself to someone else’s chapter 20 when you’re on chapter 5, focus on where you are. Celebrate your own progress. Recognize how far you’ve come. And when you look to others, do so with curiosity and motivation—not self-judgment.
So next time you catch yourself in the comparison trap, pause and ask: Is this making me feel small, or is it teaching me something?
Choose growth.
Choose inspiration.
And most importantly, choose to appreciate where you are right now.